Sunday, August 22, 2010

Vons Vendetta

Angry Email #1:

Are employees are Vons a) crazy, b) lazy or c) just plain dumb? While shopping Friday night, August 20th at around 9:00, I witnessed a man doing his grocery shopping with his pug. This is Los Angeles, does it surprise me that some idiot can't rub two brain cells together hard enough to ignite a spark of a thought, "Hey, maybe bringing my dog Freidrich to Vons where people FOOD is a bad idea!"? No. No, it does not surprise me. What surprised me is that I witnessed atleast 3 Vons employees pass right by the guy and his dog and say absolutely nothing.This was clearly not a guide dog. This was not a seizure alert dog. This was not a service dog of any kind. This was a misbehaved dog that some dude couldn't bear to leave at home for an hour. I love animals, BUT I DON'T WANT THEM NEAR MY FOOD! The guy was in the dairy aisle not paying attention while his dog was getting up on the barrier, sticking his face in cartons of yogurt. I stood there mortified. Ew Vons, that's totally gross.
Kimberly P

Stupid Response #1:

From: web.comments []
Sent: Sat 8/21/2010 3:25 PM
To: Kimberly Perplies
Subject: Re: Safeway Customer Comment [#3619475]

Dear Ms. Perplies,

Thank you for your recent correspondence regarding our service animal policy.

We appreciate the time you have taken to share your valuable feedback regarding non-service animals being permitted to enter your local Vons store. We apologize for any inconvenience you may have encountered.

Our company policy states that our employees must assume that any animal accompanying a customer is a Service Animal. Your comments will be forwarded to our Public Affairs Department for further review.

If you would like to discuss this further, please reply to this email or call our toll free number at 1-877-723-3929 and reference contact I.D. 17208250. One of our associates will be happy to assist you.

We appreciate your business and look forward to seeing you soon. Thank you for shopping at Vons.


Vons Customer Service Team

My Email #2:

Dear Vons Customer Service Team,
Thank you for your prompt response. Also, thank you for clarifying that any animal accompanying a customer is assumed to be a Service Animal by your employees per the company policy.

I'm actually quite relieved that now I can bring my pet monkey, Larry, on my shopping trips now. (see attached picture)
He is excellent at picking produce.

Thank you and have a great weekend!

Kimberly P

Stupid Response #2:

Thank you. We have received your email submitted through and we appreciate your comments. Our staff is available to respond via email, Monday through Friday. We will research and reply as quickly as possible.

You can now view our weekly advertised specials online! Simply click on the following link and enter your Zip code:

Check out our new coupon link for an easy new way to save money, time and paper by loading hundreds of coupons directly to your Club Card - in just a few clicks!

Thank you again for writing. It is always a pleasure to serve you at Safeway.

Customer Service Safeway Inc.

End Result:

This is NOT over yet. I want to march into Vons with a goat or a giant gila monster on a leash and do my shopping. I'll let him crawl all over the potatoes and over the counter into the meats of the deli case. And if anyone approaches me or says anything I will get incredibly offended and yell, "How DARE you! This is a Certified Service Gila Monster! Are you aware of the Safeway policy that ALL ANIMALS that accompany shoppers are to be considered service animals?! This is lizard discrimination!" Then I will call Gloria Allred or Larry H. Parker and sue Vons for discriminating against me, a woman who needs a Service Lizard to aid with her very serious and debilitating case of the gum disease Gingivitis.


  1. Hahaha.. u go girl.. I don't know why I never knew about ur blog before last week because its one of the greatest things ever.. I am now going to bring my cat Charlie with me to Vons so that he can personally pick out his food.. he's quite passionate about the food he eats

    -Brittany Bergman

  2. Hey, I feel you. The industry has gone to the dogs. Insensitive to the feelings and standards of people who have some sense of honor. If this continues, you will see a zoo like atmosphere. They may as well have a dirt floor. The people in the high end areas started this. And over time the stores became desensitized. Oh, until they have to clean up a pIle or a puddle.